A GRIEVING mum has revealed how her son was born eight months after his dad was stabbed to death, on his way home from a corner shop.

Jude Gayle, 30, didn't even know he was having a little boy when he was murdered in South London in September 2017.

His devastated girlfriend Rachel Goodchild, now 30, discovered she was pregnant three weeks after Jude's death – and says baby Juelz gave her a reason to keep going.

Speaking exclusively to Fabulous Digital, Rachel – who's also mum to daughter Serenity, four, with Jude – said: "I had been feeling a bit strange but I thought it was stress.

"At the time I was so deep in grief, I was barely functioning. I’d eaten nothing for three weeks.

"But once I knew I was carrying Jude’s baby, I knew I had to start looking after myself."

Rachel struggled to adjust to life as a single mum in the months following Jude's death.

She said: "When our son Juelz was born, Jude wasn’t there at my side to share the birth with me, so that was very emotional.

"It really hit me when our son was two days old, that he was going to be growing up without his father.

"I am still angry that Jude was taken from me, and sad for our children who must grow up without their lovely dad.

When I found out I was pregnant, I was so deep in grief, I was barely functioning. I’d eaten nothing for three weeks

"But I tell them, Daddy loves you. His spirit is still around you. He is guiding us in the right direction.

"Serenity often looks at pictures of her dad and sleeps on a pillow printed with pictures of him – she can’t sleep without it.

"They had a very strong bond. When Jude died, Serenity turned to her grandmother, before anybody told her what was happening, and said 'my daddy is gone'.

"She was only two-and-a-half but somehow she knew he was dead."

Hairdresser Rachel met fitness instructor Jude on a night out in 2013, when they were both living in Bournemouth, Dorset.

She said: "We had an instant connection. I gave him my number and he called me the following week.

"We arranged to go on a date – within four months we were in love and we had moved in together.

"Jude was a very fit guy, he went to the gym every day. He was into reading and self-improvement, always wanting to better himself.

"We loved eating out, going to concerts and just spending our spare time together."

It really hit me when our son was two days old, that he was going to be growing up without his father

Two years into their relationship, the couple had Serenity.

Rachel said: "Jude was a loving dad. Everything changed for him when Serenity came along.

"He was dedicated to her. I remember his face when he held her for the first time, he was in complete awe.

"He told me 'I want to make all her dreams come true'.

"We talked about having another baby, but we hadn't got round to actually trying for a second child when Jude was taken from me."

The couple moved to London shortly before Jude's death, to be closer to his family and mum Pett Roach, 60, who was ill.

They lived just 20 minutes away and spent a lot of time at her house in West Norwood, Lambeth.

On September 24 2017, Jude was cooking his signature mackeral dish for Sunday dinner at his mum's, when he realised they'd run out of tomato ketchup.

I was screaming 'don't leave us Jude, our daughter needs you'. I don't know if he heard me, but I really hope he did

Serenity loved to have ketchup with her fish, so doting dad Jude popped to the local shop – which was a three-minute walk away.

There, he was pictured on CCTV, buying the ketchup and a lollipop for his little girl.

But on the way back to his mum's, walking through an alleyway, Jude was attacked and stabbed repeatedly.

Rachel said: "The first thing we knew was when somebody started banging on the front door, shouting Jude had been attacked.

"I left Serenity with Jude’s sister Rene and ran to the alley. I could see a crowd gathered, the police and an ambulance crew were already there.

"I tried to get to Jude as the emergency crew worked on him, but people held me back.

"I was screaming 'Don't leave us Jude, we need you. Our daughter needs you'. I don't know if he heard me, but I really hope he did."

Jude was pronounced dead in the street at 6.42pm, around an hour after the stabbing, with the pot of food he'd been cooking still boiling on the stove.

Rachel said: "I had to be honest with Serenity and make sure she understood her father wasn’t coming home again.

"I told her 'Daddy has been hurt by some people, I don't know why', because I didn't know."

With the police and coroner's investigations ongoing, Jude's family couldn't cremate him for five months.

To date, no-one's been prosecuted for his murder. Three men suspected of killing him were acquitted in court in April last year, after a trial lasting several weeks.

Rachel, who was then heavily pregnant, did not give evidence. She gave birth to Juelz on June 7, 2018.

Jude’s mum Pett said:

"The past two years have been very difficult for us.

"We are left to pick up the pieces and continue with our lives, but how can we do that?

"All I hope for is justice. I want those responsible for killing my son convicted and served the maximum penalty.

On the recent second anniversary of Jude's death, police offered a £20,000 reward for information leading to a prosecution in the case.

Jude's family still have no idea why he was attacked.

Speaking in support of the appeal, Rachel said: "I want to raise our children knowing that, if you do something wrong, there is a consequence.

"But since Jude died, there has been no consequence. I don’t know why he was attacked. Nobody does. Jude hadn’t lived there for some time.

"He had no enemies. He just went to the shop and should have come home. But he didn’t.

"There are people out there who know what happened and who was responsible.

"Even the smallest amount of information could be relevant and help bring his killer to justice.

The police statement

Detective Chief Inspector Tim Wright, leading the investigation, said:

“Jude was taken away from his family in the worst way possible.

“He was a father, brother and a son and it is difficult for his loved ones, knowing nobody has been convicted of his murder.

“We have had a number of witnesses come forward with information as part of our investigation, which we are very grateful for.

“But we want anyone who has not already made contact with us to come forward.”

"Our daughter speaks daily of Jude, wanting, wishing and hoping the reality of her daddy no longer being with us is just a dream.

"She just can’t understand why he is no longer here with us – something I’ll have to face all over again as our son gets older.

"Through the actions of others, I’ve been forced into bringing up our children alone.

"I owe it to them and to the memory of Jude to get justice. I need answers. And I will never get them if people remain silent."

Last week, we spoke to a mum who takes her toddler to play on his dad's grave, after he was killed in a stabbing.

Anyone with information about Jude’s death can contact the incident room on 0208 721 4961, via the police non-emergency number 101 or anonymously with Crimestoppers on 0800 555 111.

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