Former TOWIE star Frankie Essex gave birth to her twins, whom she shares with boyfriend Luke Love, in May and has since revealed to the world that they’ve named their little bundles of joy Logan and Luella.

In her exclusive column for OK! , Frankie’s discussed a range of topics in regards to motherhood – from her first social outing with the twins and a blackout at her home when they were just a few days old, to “feeling more human again” as the babies drop their dreaded 2am feed.

This week, Frankie talks about feeling bad about her solo day out, Luella teething and brother Joey’s Dancing On Ice debut…

I felt guilty about going out by myself for the day

I treated myself to a trip to London to get one of my favourite facials at Skin Geek, but I had a bit of mum guilt about it as Luella hasn’t been feeling 100% recently. Her teeth are driving her mad, not that she’s got any! But they must be coming through. I thought she had an earache as she kept putting her hand towards her little ear, but I googled it and she hasn’t got a fever, so I don’t think it’s that.

While I’ve been out Luke has been sending me updates on the twins – it’s so cute. It’s stressful at home as we have the builders in and I feel bad, especially as Luke’s looking after the twins on his own.

Our kitchen’s finally been installed

The kitchen has finally been installed and I should have electricity in there soon. I’m well excited. The worktops are being fitted on Tuesday, so we’ll have a fully functioning kitchen very soon. It looks exactly how I wanted it to be – open and bright.

The babies will only be allowed in there in their highchairs though as we haven’t had the floors put down yet.

The rest of the house renovations are coming on well. The bathrooms are all done, upstairs and the hallway is done, and then we need to get rid of the carpet on the stairs which is full of dust so we can finish the painting and get the floor laid. Once the floor’s done, it’ll basically be finished.

I’m going to watch Joey’s Dancing On Ice debut

I’m ready for my first little night out of the year to go watch Joey on Dancing On Ice. We’re all going: me, Luke, my dad, my dad’s girlfriend, and my nan. All of us are going to support him.

Luke and I weren’t sure if we could go because my dad and Sasha (his partner) are usually our babysitters, but Sasha’s daughter is going to watch them. We’re not allowed to take them with us to the show as they’ve got to be four and above.

I’m really looking forward to it. I think Joey’ll do well, he’s really confident anyway but on the night he’ll probably feel differently when it’s live.

I haven’t met his partner Vanessa yet. I’ve heard the rumours about him getting friendly with her, but I haven’t asked him about it… I’ve gone to ask, but I forget.

It’s probably quite easy to end up dating someone in that situation as you’re literally with them all the time.

After Harry's book, I want to do my own

We saw Harry’s book in Waterstones, which is half price already… I said to look ‘Should we get it?’ and he [Luke] said no. He insisted that no one’s buying it.

I haven’t thought about doing my own book as I’ve never been offered it, but maybe I should speak to my agent about it. I obviously post a lot on Instagram, but it’s hard to keep up on it all. I don’t know how influencer mum’s do it and look after a kid.

I’ve still not fully recovered from my pregnancy and birth

It’s been nearly seven months since the twins were born and my C-section scar still hurts a bit sometimes. I presume all my organs are back together and where they should be by now though.

My back is bad too. Sometimes it locks and it’s awful. It was bad before the twins, but now it’s even worse. It hurts a lot. Luke keeps telling me to go for a massage, but I’ve got too many things to be doing. I know I’ve had my facial, but I had that booked in for ages and I can’t keep skipping off and leaving the babies.

I should do it though because I don’t want a bad back when I’m older. It’s so important to look after yourself and your body.

I’m reluctant to ask people for help

I’m so independent. It’s who I am as a person – I hate asking for help. I just don’t ask and I never have done. I just like to do it myself!

My lovely neighbour recently said, 'If you ever need me, just let me know!' but I need her a lot, so I can’t just be like, 'Oh Vick, can you pop in and help me?' every time.

Come back next week to hear more about Frankie's motherhood journey.

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