I think I want to transition into a woman but I worry I'm too old

DEAR DEIDRE: I’VE been dressing up in women’s clothes since I was a little boy.

When I’m wearing a dress I feel like me – the me I should be.


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Putting on make-up, lingerie and pretty clothes makes me feel so happy, when the rest of the time I feel like I’m acting a role.

I think I’d really like to be a woman, but at 59 I know it’s too late to have an operation on the NHS.

Nobody knows I crossdress. Outwardly, I’m a middle-aged man with a respectable job.

I’m single now but I did try telling a couple of ex-girlfriends and they found it impossible to accept. So I’ve since kept it a secret.

I’ve probably only got another 20 years of life left. I don’t want to die with regrets.

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DEIDRE SAYS: Yes, it does sound like you are confused about your gender identity.

Wanting to wear women’s clothes – cross-dressing, or transvestism – is different from actually wanting to be a woman.

Having an operation is irreversible, and you would need to live full-time as a woman first.

It would be helpful for you to talk to someone who understands.

Please contact the beaumontsociety.org.uk (01582 412 220) for advice and support.

My support pack Cross-dressing would be useful to read too.

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