My girlfriend hates it if I put my arms around her for a cuddle when we are in bed at night

She is a nurse so is usually tired when she comes in but I always have a meal ready and then run her a bath.

If I so much as put my arm around her across the bed, though, she shouts: “Get away from me, you moron! You’re waking me up!”

And if I touch her in my sleep and there’s hell to pay. It’s really affecting me.

She could cuddle me all night as far as I was concerned – I’d love it – but she never comes near me.

She’s 29 and I’m 32.


Yet many find it hard to talk about. My e-leaflet Masturbation Worries? explains and reassures. Email me or private message my Facebook page.

DEIDRE SAYS: Tell her how upsetting you are finding this rejection.

Explain you are a tactile person. Ask her to have a kiss and a cuddle before you sleep – but promise you won’t press for sex unless that is what she wants.

Then promise you will put a bolster or pillows between you, so you keep to your sides of the bed and she gets a good night’s sleep.

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